Adventures of a Midwest Transplant

Not Quite Natural

I am a fan of natural. Not all natural, like I-don’t-wear-deodorant natural. But some natural, like I-don’t-eat-processed-ass-Twinkies natural. It feels like a double standard sometimes. Like I prefer my natural hair, but not my natural hair color. I prefer my natural width (will never hide my hips) but not my natural height (I love my high-heeled shoes).

Things That Aren’t Natural That Creep Me Out

Seedless watermelon and grapes: fruit is supposed to reproduce! That seedless shit isn’t right.

Weave: Sorry for folks who like to buy their length, but it smells, it’s too expensive, and it looks unnatural.

Genetically enhanced chicken: no breast, leg, or wing is supposed to be that large unless it comes from a turkey!

Artificial sweeteners: I can’t even ingest aspartame because it upsets my stomach, but none of that stuff is okay in my book.

Things That Aren’t Natural That Aren’t So Bad

Most hair care products for African-Americans: with the exception of jheri curl products and brown hair gel, the chemist in me loves relaxers, conditioners, etc.

Ice packs and cool packs: that stuff that keeps your body cool or your drink cool are fine with me. Just don’t ever drink it.

Gemstones made in a lab: the stone in my engagement ring was made in a lab, and it’s so much more vibrant (not to mention less outrageously priced) than one someone found in a rock. Plus no foreign miners lost arms to get my stone.

Do you prefer things natural? Or are you more like me with a widely varying stance on what should be natural and what shouldn’t?

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4 responses

  1. Fluorescent colored food just creeps me out– especially fluorescent cupcake frosting– nothing that bright could possibly be good for you!

    July 11, 2012 at 08:11

    • I should add that to my list too! For me it’s drinks though. I get when stuff is “orange” flavored, but how can it be “red” flavored?! Red is not a flavor!

      July 12, 2012 at 23:26

  2. Ok cool:I can understand why you may be creeped out about certain in organic foods.

    I was a strict vegetarian for 5 years,to this day,don’t eat red mean(since age 11).

    However,over the past year,I changed my diet and went back to eating anything(except pork).

    My point is,healthy ppl,or ppl who eat organic or “natural” stuff do NOT live longer than ppl who eat crap.

    There’s no scientific data to say or prove that changing of one’s diet,or eating organic stuff will extend your life.

    Vegans and natural-food eaters die early(compared to ppl who eat crap,processed foods,etc.).

    Look at all the oldest ppl in the world (centarians and ppl over 100),they don’t know shit about eating healthy,natural and Vegan.

    My great grandfather is 96.And guess what he eats regularly:burgers and fries,sodas and milkshakes.You can’t get him to eat a vegetable,yet he’s still alive.

    So it’s a great myth and scam by health-food industry and natural-food growers just to get their products sold.

    Sure!Watermelon without seeds would creep me out too lol.But I know that eating it won’t mean I’m gonna die prematurely from eating unnatural food..

    July 11, 2012 at 12:42

    • Eating healthy doesn’t lengthen your life, but it sure as hell improves the quality. If you want to roll the dice that you’ll still have good metabolism, joints, lungs, and muscles in your old age without any effort, good luck with that. But the fat ass Americans weighing down the planet in large numbers will tell you statistics aren’t on your side. I’d prefer to do my part with healthier food and give my genetics a push in the right direction. I’ll never eat healthy for the sake of healthy though, food still has to taste good. Butter, olive oil, wine, and salt are all natural and make everything taste great!

      July 12, 2012 at 23:30