Musings of a Chicago-Born New Yorker

Bringing Back Date Night

The last six weeks or so have been difficult on the husband and me. We haven’t had a lot of mutual free time. We used to make Tuesdays special and that was great. But then we never were free on Tuesday, so we did date night when we were free. Then we looked up and weeks had passed without any time spent just the two of us.

Instead of trying to come up with some big solution that required him cancelling a gig or something. So we’re trying spontaneity. I decided to make a pie Thursday night while the husband was at a gig. He got home right when I was putting the pie in the oven. Instead of cooking a late dinner, we decided to go out to Bijon.

Bijon is this great restaurant we love. It’s our late night spot, though we did have a couple meals there during the Chicago leg of our honeymoon.

On the way to Bijon, we stumbled onto a movie set. As in, a guy was explaining that we were in the way and at the same time a motorcycle flew past while and SUV with a mounted camera chased it. It was awesome and also disconcerting. As we drove away, I had so many questions. 1) Why didn’t they block off the street? 2) Will the director mention us being in the way on the commentary? 3) What movie is this for? 4) Are they using Chicago as Chicago, or will they pretend it’s another city?

We finally got Bijon after driving several blocks out of our way. That place was jumping. There was only one available table and it was all ours. After 10 minutes, we both agreed it felt like it did when we were first dating. I don’t know that we had officially lost that feeling, but it had definitely gotten muddled in everything else we had to do.

With work, music, family, friends, vacations, making budgets, there are just so many things to juggle. It was nice to get back to the reason we chose to spend our lives together. We just have a good ass time together. Laughing, sharing dreams, flirting, enjoying good food. That’s our bread and butter, pun intended.

The husband and I were reminded to keep our “us time” a priority. It keeps things light and fun and makes sure we can handle everything else. Trying to make the most of the time we do have can only help us.

For instance, the next day, we only had about 90 from me waking to up to leaving for work. So I made us a quick lunch with burgers and a salad. And then we watched an episode of Breaking Bad on Netflix. Doing stuff together is great; we don’t have to sit there staring into each other’s eyes by candlelight to feel connected.

Now I’m back to being filled with hope for feeling like a newlywed forever. Or at least until we have kids.

How do you keep the flame going in your relationship?

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